I’m so tired of being selfish and living for me. I’m tired of my “devilish” side taking over me and being the main controlling aspect of my life. I want to be in control of my life. I want to be me loving you, loving God, loving others. That’s what I want. How do I do this? How do I die to my flesh without becoming “religious?” I want to be real at the same time. I don’t want to fight so hard, I just want to “be.”